Valuable Lessons

I've learned a lot today.. And it's not just the sake and coffee and staying up all night talking.
I know in my life, I've backed down and let others walk all over me. One day, I woke up, and in anger, I lashed out. I went from extreme passive to extreme aggressive.. Then, I calmed down. But with my losses, i also lost a major part of myself. I lost security in my own judgments. I question myself, and wonder, "am i overreacting? am i wrong? am i right?"
You know in your own heart, your gut, when you really have done something wrong. We all have an innate judgment, but it's often clouded by many things. I realize, I have a weakness in letting others manipulate me. I have other weaknesses too, but I also realize that I should forgive myself for them, just as I forgive others for theirs.
I know, sometimes, it's good to be the bigger person and subject your pride to keep the peace.. But when does that line stop and the line of your self worth start? Where does it cross? And why should you beg for forgiveness when you've done nothing wrong?
I would, I have done it before. I give a lot of myself. My time, my energy, for the people I care about. I do it for love.. Because I love, and because I care. All I ask in return is understanding, acceptance, and compassion. The same thing I give to everyone else.
If I'm stubborn, over-reactive, over-defensive in another person's eyes and being friends with me is a chore, then maybe it's time to re-evaluate the situation. Maybe it's time to let it go. If even for a while.. I can't make anyone see my side of things, and if they don't or can't, I can't blame them. It's just a difference of opinion, and if no one can just agree to disagree, and it continues to always cause problems and is destructive for everyone, then you only have two choices..
Deal with it, or go elsewhere.
I'm not sure about my choice.. It's painful.. But every day I ignore it, it slowly takes more out of me. And I already feel I'm running on empty.